Centered

 Cross stitching has been the one hobby that I have continued to stay with.  Others come and go and I've actually done many other craft projects that I'm very proud of.  But cross stitching stays.  For me the biggest challenge in beginning a new project is finding the center.  It is crucial for the way I work to find the exact center of my fabric and of my pattern.  Once these are a known factor I start building my piece, stitch by stitch from the center.  The proper name for what I do is "counted" cross stitch because you are transferring a paper pattern's symbols for colors, etc. onto a blank canvas by counting each stitch in order to replicate the picture shown in the pattern.  

There is a spiritual lesson in my craft.

It occurs

Finding center is almost vital in life and all of its activities.

Centrally located - easy to find for everyone.

The game can't start until the center snaps the ball.

The level has the bubble in the center.

But what about us?  Are we centered?

Centered and grounded do not necessarily mean intractable or immovable.  It simply means we have found our emotional and moral center and once those are found we find a peace there.

Being centered is NOT the same as SELF-centeredness.  To be self-centered is to have an overreaching concern with one's self......"self love" (a big buzz word these days).....egotism.  Being self-centered usurps Biblical ccommands to love and care for others, to not pass judgment on others, to bear others' burdens, and to be kind and forgiving.  Self centeredness is directly opposed to the clear command, "No one should seek their own good, but the good of others."

Our dedication to self-love is rebellion against God's authority and is rooted in the fleshly desire to please ourselves more than God.  We supplant God's authority with our own ego.

The past few years have done much to ground me and more importantly to help me find my own center. At my core, I am a decent person who loves hard and forgives easily.  I do have a difficult time forgetting....well, except for this morning when I appeared at the drive through window of Burger King without first having availed myself of their ordering process.  I am not selfish, nor am I guilty of excluding people who have differing ideas and beliefs.

In finding my center, I found myself.  My true and authentic self which as it turns out was the person I always was but kept squashed down under perceived expectations of who and what I should be.  I had lost myself but God knew where I was all along.  And I realize that He was waiting for me to realize that He made a version of me that pleased Him and to try to be anything else would knock me off balance.  Tilting to one side or another long enough makes it very difficult to swing back to center unless you hand the reins to One who loves you best and allow Him to plant your feet firmly on the solid rock that is dead level.

Today, I found God in a cross  It was only a little stitch, but He was waiting there right in the center.

I'LL be the Judge of That! Oh, AND you!

Self appointed judges of our character.  People who love to point out our short comings, our failures, our inability to please.  An inability to please…..them.

Some of the most judgmental people I have ever seen have the worst character flaws imaginable.  And instead of spending any time in introspective thinking….they lash out delivering their judgement on others around them.  Oddly enough, they are very adept at delivering their judgements, hammering home their point and then………they vaporize before you can react, defend or try to engage in civil discourse.  You see, judgmental people are cowards.  They cannot allow any dissenting voice to penetrate their vile behavior.  Because they know....they know their behavior is wrong but as long as they don't have to hear anyone say so....it never happened.

Judgmental people quite often have a heaping helping of rampant narcissism to go along with their judgements.  They are perfect, they are the smartest, they are the most highly evolved, they have all the answers to all the issues of life and they NEVER make mistakes.  Well....not the mistakes YOU make.....and yours are THE WORST.  Therefore, there is no defense for you.  You are judged….found lacking….and sentenced to whatever punishment they see fit.

Usually the judgement is to remove you from their privileged and holy presence.

Hurt me.

I already have an unhealthy dose of self doubt, guilt, and remorse at times, and quite frankly….your judgement of me is actually quite weak in comparison to the nasty little platter of self loathing that I keep tucked away in emotional Tupperware to be revisited at will.

Could I judge you?  Oh, my dear….yes, yes I could.  Should I judge you?  That bitter little bugger that sits on my left shoulder screams……”DO IT….YOU’LL FEEL BETTER!”  And maybe I would….for a minute.  But then……my better angels will admonish me to rise, to keep silent….and to love…..even you.  And most of all, they counsel for me to let go of you and let God work his work in His time.

At this moment in time I am unchurched.  I am unchurched in a traditional sense.  I have become a person who has found that I want to hear God speak to me without it coming from someone else’s thought process or voice.  I have turned my thinking inward more definitively….I am constantly listening with my heart’s ears.  And, I hear.  And I am often led to The Book by events of the day.  And so, recently, the judgements of others on myself and other people have been playing heavily in real time, here is….and hear what God says to me and to you about judging.

“Judge not, that ye be not judged.  For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged; and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.  And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam is in thine own eye?  Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.”  Matthew 7: 1-5

It is stunning to me to see the number of every Sunday church attendees that miss this lesson completely.  But, there I go judging.  Sorry.

I love the KJV of the Word – but I will attempt here to make this easier for some to understand.  Don’t judge anyone.  Because when you do, you are going to be judged yourself equally and more.  Stop looking at and pointing out flaws in others and ignoring your own big issues.  You can’t help anyone with their issues, problems or offenses until you deal with your own first.  Your knowledge of people is limited to what they have allowed you to know.  You do not know their big story...your know chapter 2, 5 and 20.  The things that happened in the other chapters are the things they have to manage daily....silently, and alone.

All I know is….I surely don’t want to be judged as harshly as I have judged some people.  I’m trying to stop doing that….how about you?